a whole new world...

breathe in. breathe out. repeat.

The days are becoming a blurr... In this blurr I've accepted the fact that I really want to document this entire experience. I want to be able to recall these next four months for the rest of my life. I don't have a clue as to what they will hold for me, but I am very interested to find out.

Moving to Toronto for my placement has been such a long thought process that I don't really think I actually got a chance to really let the idea sink in.
and sink in it did.

As soon as I saw my mom drive away from my new place of residence in the east end of Toronto, residents refer to this side of town as East York for you non-torontonians... I digress.
The feeling of being completely alone and away from my mom really got to me. I think it's still getting to me that I will be living in this city for at least 4 months... Not really knowing when I will see my mom next is really weird... daunting almost. But at the same time, I can't help but feel a sense of excitement at the anticipation of what kinds of adventures I'm going to embark on.

I will try to update this as much as possible. not for the sake of an audience, but for the sake of knowing that one day down the road I will be able to recall these memories by the click of a mouse.

xx live well,

lazy sunday

dealing with a massive hangover due to last night debauchery has taken over my sunday.
All of the sudden, cleaning my room, doing laundry and leaving the house have all been replaced by a sudden urge to watch a 10+ hour CSI marathon. Too much? probably.

Spoke with Army man last night. Called to check in and see how his first week of school went, and somehow we ended up making plans to hangout. I can't help but be skeptical and keep my guard up in case he bails.... An update will follow mid-week.

I'm starting to wonder if I should consider documenting my outfits. Silly thought, but am very intrigued buy the benefits that would have on my shopping OCD.*

Re-cap of the last few days:
-KS celebrated her birthday last night. In true fashion we showed up at the bar and tore it up; and then I pulled an ultimate me-move and proceeded to bail and go home just after 1.
-Went tobogganing with the bearded man, tall and skinny man and some of their friends. It was SO much fun. We tobogganed for what seemed like hours, and had an absolute blast!

*I swear it makes sense... Being able to see which pieces in my closet work, which don't and actually being able to see what I look like on a regular basis might help me shop my own closet. Am I rambling?

overwhelmed.

Tonight was probably one of the happiest nights of the year (5 days in, pretty big call, I know).
Dinner tonight was at the best friends' parents house. With Mamia and Papi.
Everything from the company, food and conversation was extraordinary. I had a hard time fighting back the tears that welled up when The Granade gave Mamia the most beautiful and heartfelt gift. A hand-knitted table cloth (with matching napkins!) that he brought back many moons ago from Syria.
Its times like these that I feel my heart swell at knowing that these people are, in fact, a part of my life. I can't really describe how proud I am to count them as part of my family.

The next coming months are going to be challenging*, but keeping this blog and these entries are whats going to keep me going. Knowing that there are these people, though scattered through the world, who care about me and my family.

I am greatful for those that are around me, and those who may be far but whose love is constantly with me...



*to say the least

ps: dad, I am missing you like heck today. love.

Happy New Year! I hope your coming Year is filled with excitement and happiness. I hope you’re inspired to write and create and love and live out loud. I hope you dream beautiful, bewildering dreams that keep you believing in possibilities and, most importantly, yourself. I hope you read some fine books, travel to great places, see some things that scare you, kiss someone who thinks you’re wonderful-who you think is wonderful. And I hope sometime within this next year, you really surprise yourself. (via http://christinerojas.tumblr.com/)

Want a recap of how the first 12 days of the year were spent? So far the daily wrap up is as follows...

January 1st. Bearded man called, we went for breakfast. Might have been the air, or the tea.. But I finally accepted that he might not be in to me*. After a very uncomfortable 20 minutes at his house, I promptly got up and came home. I spent all day in bed, lounging... bored.


January 2nd. B-uuu-uuuu-uuuuuuuuuuuuuuud had me over at his pad for some pints. By pints I mean an awesome 2-4 challenge. Although I didnt come close to winning, I did beat my contenders and went to bed at 1 am.

January 3rd. Magical day. Grabbed bittie and went to the market for an epic feast. We shared a bottle of vino and some 'za. Hung out with the familia afterwards, then came home.

January 4th. Drone. Might play with Glen Cairn folk later on.

ps: Army man is out of the picture. It hurts, but it hurts more to be in constant wondering.




*I am broken, un-datable apparently