i wrote you a very heartfelt and emotional e-mail last night. After pressing send, I did my post-sending ritual... I re-read everything that I had said, and then tried to imagine how or what you think about everything that I had to say.
I'm trying to keep my guard up, and not let my heart get in the way of my mind, but I can feel myself slipping. I can't help but feel lost when I think about you... Being so far away from me, and from what you know as home. When you replied this afternoon, you mentioned something along the lines of taking time when you get home to get used to being in a civilized society, and how it might take you a little time. How very selfish of me to think that your head would be where mine is.
Ready, to make a commitment.
Ready, to let someone in to my heart.
(as much as I hate to admit it, I am also ready to get my heart broken because you may not feel the same way.)
----on a side note, I was kindly reminded by MTV's "If you really knew me" that highschool was such weird social experiment... but I survived. I was able to walk away from all the craziness with a highschool diploma (baerly).
And today, I am so far from that.
I am working a full-time corporate america job.
I am happy.
I am at ease with my self (for the most part)
I am proud of myself for accomplishing so many things in just a few months.